As women, we tend to be natural caregivers, wanting everything to be picture perfect: the perfect decorations, the perfect gifts, the perfect hostess. But one thing that I ask my clients is :
- Is this a realistic expectation?
- Does it reflect your core values?
- What purpose does it serve?
With these three questions, start to look at these answers as an observer, as if a friend was asking you what to do. Start to create a picture of what you can do to make this holiday season focused on what is really important. Here are a few tips:
- Focus on just enjoying the company of others and not on what this relationship might become.
- Use this time to get to know one another. One thing we do is play family games. There is a lot less tension is a room when games are played. No need to think of things to say or do.
- Create a little something special for the kids and other guests, nothing complicated, like an ornament to commemorate this occasion for which you might start a new tradition, or do a stocking and put useful and fun items in there.
- Find time to reenergize yourself throughout the visit. If you are use to being just the two of you, and then all of a sudden the house seems to expand with lots of kids, it's important to find a space for you to regroup yourself, take a breather and then come back.
This is a time that many find hard and stressful. Being aware that it is normal and that you can do something about it will give you a sense of control and possibilities for changes.
Wishing you and your family a safe and happy Holiday Season